When Life Isn't Fair

Even when it is something I don't necessarily want to hear, I just love it when God so obviously is speaking to me through whatever means available.

Let me explain a little background info: My sister announced last June she was getting married. Of course I want to go, but along the way we have hit more then one bump in the road. In fact it has seemed more like a roller coaster ride then a bumpy road, trying to get my husband's leave approved (he is military, and nothing about being in the military is ever simple!). It isn't a matter of being told 'no' though, just 'wait' and then 'wait' again. We have jumped through many hoops trying to get it through, and there are many complicated reasons we have had problems, most of which were out of our hands, and to me, very unfair. Our biggest issue is time and money, it is expensive to leave the island, and we need to buy tickets in advance, as well as order me a bridesmaid dress if I will be able to get there. The whole thing has dragged out for over a month now for us, and I haven't felt any peace throughout the whole thing!

My husband feels defeated, and he just wants me to let it go and wait more, but I feel wronged. I want to call up his chain of command and say "That's NOT fair!" I want to find a way for 'justice' to be done, the kind of justice when I get my way, and the person unjustly standing in my path gets reprimanded.

And then today, I was looking through the new posts of the blogs I follow when I came across a post titled Why not just be wronged?. At first, I did not want to click on it. I didn't want to hear that I should just accept what has happened and let it go. After all my anger and frustration are justified, this just shouldn't be happening to us.

But I could not deny God His chance to speak to me through this blog. It was obvious, this was for me.

Why not rather be wronged? Why not rather be defrauded? ~ 1 Corinthians 6:7b

Commit your way to the Lord, Trust also in Him, and He will do it. He will bring forth your righteousness as the light and your judgement as the noonday. Rest int he Lord and wait patiently for Him; Do not fret because of him who prospers in his way... ~Psalm 37:5-7b

It isn't easy to accept, but sometimes we will be wronged, even as Christians. Even the world has their own way of saying it- Life isn't fair. Ultimately though God's justice will prevail, and that is what matters. I am not the judge, I am not the one who should seek punishment and reprimand for those who I feel are against me or have wronged me. Sometimes we need to just let it go, instead of having it fester in our hearts, creating an infection that can spread to other parts of our lives. If we want to be healthy in our walk with the Lord, it is important to let go and move on, even if we are being wronged. God is in control and He will work everything out for good, for His will.

As for the wedding, I hope I am able to go. But ultimately God knows best and He is in control. Even if I don't like the answer, just remembering He is the one in control, brings me peace. I was just struggling with keeping that in mind because in my heart I didn't want the answer to be no, or even wait. I wanted to be the one behind the wheel, but I am reminded once again, that God is the better driver when it comes to my life. For now I will just continue to pray that everything falls into place, and we are able to go, whatever the answer may be.

(And if you haven't already, I seriously encourage you to check out Mary DeMuth's post. Maybe you will also get something from it!)

Top Ten Tuesday: Just A Few Blogs I Enjoy

This week I thought I would share about some of the blogs that have really encouraged me these past months. So here is the list of 10 of my favorite blogs (in no particular order, and by no means all of my favorites).

1.
This blog was started by a friend of mine from church. Her name is Janna, and she also blogs at The Adventure of Motherhood. Her blog was what initially got me thinking, hey I could do that! She has been a great encouragement and inspiration to me from the start, and I am just loving her new blog Mommy's Piggy Tales, which is all about recording your youth so that someday your children and grandchildren can read about it! We are just over half way through the first 15 week session now, but there will be a new session starting in October. I encourage everyone to contact Janna and begin recording your memories in October, I am even going to do it again, which is funny because I didn't think I could make it through this first one, but it has been such a treasure to me each week!!

2. Many of the things Kristen has written about have challenged and convicted me. I want that American Dream too, but do I want it more then I want to serve the Lord? She also does a lot of fun giveaways. So stop by her blog and I encourage everyone to read specifically her post When Jesus Isn't Enough.

3. Marsha is the mommy behind this blog and she is a true treasure. It is hard not to feel like God is against you when you lose a child, but she has pulled through and found comfort in the Lord in the midst of terrible tragedy. It is an encouragement to me to know God can get us all through any trial as long as we look to Him, He will never forget us, but always love and comfort us.

4. Everyday Adventures. This is a blog I have only been reading a very short time and already I feel refreshed by the topics Charissa shares on. She reminds me of things I need to keep on top of in my walk with the Lord. Her words seem so on point with how I often feel myself!!

5.

I love the title of Kathryn's blog! So witty and so true! As Christians we should be 'singing in the rain', we should be joyful even in times of trial, and Kathryn's writing wonderfully reflects the title of her blog. And as another military wife, it is good to be able to share and encourage one another, as not everyone can understand the struggles that are unique to military life.

6.
This is another new blog for me, but what a wonderful idea, and so far I am enjoying what I read. Kathryn of Singing through the Rain also does one of the bible studies on this blog. Basically they have 5 different bloggers who each are going through a bible study one day a week! I encourage everyone to go check it out!

7. Of Such is The Kingdom. This blog just celebrated it's 1st birthday! It has been a joy to read about Olivia's childhood, and also her child's, as we have shared with each other and other women on Mommy's Piggy Tales.

8. Ordinary Inspirations Traci has wonderful insights and wise words on so many different topics! It has been a pleasure and inspiration to read about her views and God's truths as she presents them, as well as her many informative posts and reviews of products. One post I found particularly good was about change, something I myself do NOT like, but her words are very true, we should not be like gross stagnant water!


9.
Cameron is another mommy blogger who is doing the Mommy's Piggy Tales with me! She has some great views on many topics as a mother and awesome tips for new bloggers!
And she is also very respectful of others views and choices, especially in caring for your child, check out her post Let's Hear it for the Parents Who FEED their Babies!!

10.
I have been trying out a few of SnoWhite's recipes, and so far so good!! I am constantly looking for quick and easy, but yummy meals to make for our family. One of our recent favorites from SnoWhite's many wonderful recipes- Ham & Broccoli Shells- which just also happens to remind me a whole lot of a pasta dish my mom and grandma used to make with ham, broccoli and spaghetti noodles! We have had this once a week now for going on our 3rd week!!

This post is linked to which is hosted by ohamanda, another great blog I might add!

Blog Bash: The Crystal Behind Crystalized Reflections

Part of blogging, I have discovered is community. In fact it's a HUGE part! So I am putting in my effort to be seen and heard!! I am attending a Blog Bash hosted by Not Your Average Teen.

Growing up, I myself was 'not your average teen'. I was the oldest of 4 girls raised by a single mother. I was the responsible one. And if my mom had let me, I would've been the boss! I had a job early in life, but also made church and God a priority. I grew to have a love of writing as well from an early age, and one of my first bits of poetry was something I wrote about God and His love and mercy, then I read it in front of my small 'country' church. (I am not sure my old friends would consider it a country church, but after the churches I have now seen, I know that's exactly what it is!)
I graduated high school in 2003 having very little idea about what I wanted to do in life. The only things I did know were that I wanted to help people, I felt God had gifted me with compassion and I wanted to share that with the world. And I also was sure I wanted to be a wife and mother. Since I was at a loss as for what to do in college, I decided to start with what I did know I wanted: a husband. And God had brought me just that.



I met Jon in March of 2003 during my senior year when a friend from his boat invited him to our church. I asked him to take me to my prom in May, and in July he asked me to be his wife (with a little prompting- I am not very patient!). By December we were married- again VERY impatient- and we had a year left before we would face our first military move. During most of that year I was very anxious to get pregnant, and after 10 months I saw those 2 pink lines confirming my hopes, finally! Sadly though, just after our move to the East coast, after Christmas and our 1st anniversary, I had a miscarriage. But I didn't let it keep me down long!
By Mother's Day I was again pregnant with my now 4 year old daughter. Natalie is an interesting child, a drama queen like her mommy, and a silly goose like her daddy. She is also very smart if you ask me, and I am not sure who exactly that came from. Each day with her is a completely new adventure as I never know what will come out of her mouth next- sometimes for the better, others for the worse!



As we approached our next move, an even bigger move, overseas to Guam, we had planned to wait on a 2nd baby after another miscarriage shortly before the move. But God thought otherwise when He blessed us with a surprise baby, that we discovered just a month before we made our long trip to our new home. Zachary joined our family just a month and half after Natalie's 3rd birthday. He is fun and tender hearted. I take much joy in hearing his giggles each day, and comforting him when he falls (which he currently does a lot of as he begins to learn to walk). He still surprises me often with how smart he is for his age and how perceptive also.



I am hoping in another year to go back to school to get a degree in psychology. I am now interested in the field of social work or possibly a school counselor. That may change though as I am also longing for a third child, though we are currently planning to wait until we are back in the states and closer to family. We have 1 more year officially left on our little island of Guam, as we await approval of an extension for an additional year. Though I am not in love with the climate, I do love the people here!
Well that's me in a nutshell!

I am also supposed to answer 5 questions about myself as a blogger:

1. Why do you blog? I blog because I enjoy writing. When I was 12 years old one of my half brothers got in contact with me, he sent me some of his poetry. I wanted to be able to write as well as he did. In junior high and through high school I wrote my own poetry. I found inspiration everywhere I looked and the words just flowed through me. Until recently though, I have been in a sort of writer's block. I was so busy being a wife and mother, I let myself slip through the cracks and rarely got around to one of my first loves. Then I began reading a blog belonging to a friend of mine. She wrote about motherhood, and I again longed to have the words flow through me again. So I started my own blog! I want to be able to use the trials and the triumphs God has placed in my life to help other women. What better way then through a blog! I am also beginning to really get into it and enjoy the community in it. I am a stay at home mom and I don't have a car to get out much, so the social aspect keeps me in touch with the rest of the world when I sometimes feel out of touch!

2. What do you blog about? Everything and anything! I blog about what has happened to me in the past, good and bad. I blog about my faith. I blog about being a stay at home mother. About being a Navy wife. I enjoy occasionally sharing a bit of poetry or creative writing. Someday I may also blog about cake decorating, it is a more recent hobby I am endeavoring at. I blog about life!

3. What do you find you get the biggest reward from blogging? My biggest reward is the comments I get. I am encouraged to know others are reading and enjoying what I share. Even when someone doesn't leave a comment, the thought that somehow what I wrote might help to encourage or lift up someone else, is in itself encouraging to me. I may not ever know how God will use some of the things I write, but I don't doubt He will use them and I long to serve Him.

4. How long have you been blogging? Only a short time. I began a blog under a different title last year, but I somehow felt like I was held back. I didn't quite know how or where to start with my blogging. Then last month the same friend whose blog encouraged me to write again, started a series about recording our youth. I started writing for her series and just haven't stopped since! I feel much more confident in it now then I did originally.

5. Let's hear the story behind your blog title. Well I wanted something clever and witty, but it seemed all the good ones were already taken! I also wanted something not to specific, I didn't want to limit myself to only writing about baking or poetry or motherhood (not that that seems to have stopped any other blogging mommies I have run across- good for them!). So I started playing with my name. And it just sort of came to me from there as I browsed through a thesaurus. Crystalized I derived from a play on my name, reflections was a synonym for thoughts. My husband loved it and so did I, so it just stuck! Then I got my little subtitle: Seeing Life through a Crystal, obviously from the meaning of my name- a clear (and brilliant) rock. I just love playing with words like that!

My First Blogger Award!

Wow! I got my first blog award from another blogging mommy, Ingenue Mom! Thank you Cameron! It is exciting to think that others are enjoying the things I write about, and I am excited to read what other mommy's blog about as well!

To officially accept the award, as I understand, I have to share 7 things about myself you may not know...
1. I complusively buy Disney movies! I just can't get enough! My mom never really bought us movies as a kid, but my grandma would spoil us with the occasional Disney flick. So I decided long ago I would collect as many as possible for my own children to watch! Even ones I am not crazy about!!
2. I love to bake, but not cook! Whipping up a dessert makes me feel warm and cozy inside, but ask me to make you some eggs and I will drag my feet on the long walk to the kitchen!
3. You might have assumed from #2, but I have the biggest sweet tooth ever! Seriously, you may think you have it bad, but when my husband isn't home, I sometimes eat ice cream for lunch (after I have sent my daughter to play in her room so she doesn't get the same idea)!!
4. My husband insists I am the only person on the planet whose toenails curve out instead of inward. It drives him crazy because when my toenails are long and pretty his legs get scratched up in bed!
5. I love baby names. I constantly am searching for my next favorite baby name. We do hope to have one more someday and so far that baby is looking to have about fifty names if I were to use all my favorites!
6. One of my favorite channels is Food Network. Though I always swore I would never get into all those reality shows, I LOVE "Worst Cooks in America" and "The Next Food Network Star".
7. I am crazy about children's parties! I could plan one for my kids every month and be a very happy woman, despite the pressure that sometimes follows them. I love to go all out and see the looks on the kids faces! I only wish my children's 2 birthdays were spread out in the year so I could always be planning and thinking of one, instead of 2 in a row then another 10 months to go before another party!

And now it is my privilege to pass this award along. I guess I am supposed to give it to 5 other bloggers, but I haven't regularly been reading even that many yet because I am so new to the blogging world! So I will just give it to the ones I have been enjoying the most lately... The Adventures of Motherhood, Of Such is the Kingdom, and Living to Tell the Story