Top Ten Tuesday: The Power of Prayer

I know prayer is a very powerful tool. In fact it is one of the easiest things a Christian can do, but also something we tend to neglect so often. These are the burdens on my heart today. I have prayed over these all weekend, and continue to throughout this week. I want to be a prayer warrior for God. Will you pray with me?

1. For my family: Our family has been in waiting to get approval from my husband's job for an opportunity to go home for my sister's wedding. For over a month and half we have been praying and waiting- sometimes patiently, sometimes not so patiently- to receive our answer so that we may buy tickets. We are reaching the point though when we will have only 1 month to go and a decision must be reached on our part, whether or not to go. Pray my husband's work will give us their answer this week, before we have to make the final decision to cancel the trip.

2. For my extended family: This past week there was a birth on my husband's side of the family. Without going into too much detail, the pregnancy was hidden and there are still concerns of possible rape that may have occurred. My husband's family needs prayers for wisdom and healing during this time.

3. For my friends: A particular friend from church shared with me this past Sunday morning about another friend of hers who had passed away very suddenly. She leaves behind a husband and a 3 month old baby. It breaks my heart to think of a child growing up without a mother, yet so many do. Pray for those she left behind to seek the Lord's comfort in this time of grief.

4. For my church family: In our church this week, as I shared on my last Top Ten Tuesday post, we are having Summit Meetings with a guest evangelist, Harold Vaughan. It has been wonderful to hear the Lord speak through his powerful messages. Pray as the week goes on, more visitors may come and hear the Gospel, and more may find an eternal salvation through Jesus Christ.

5. For other moms: I read about Leslie Evans this weekend, and my heart was broken for her and her family. You can read more about her story here. Please pray for healing of her body as she is in a coma after giving birth to premature twins at 21 weeks pregnant, both babies have gone on to be with the Lord, and pray for wisdom for her family and doctors in the decisions to be made.

6. For missionaries: We are all called to share the Gospel as Christians. Each in our own way, but there are those who are specifically called as missionaries. Our church supports many, but in particular, there is a family on another of the Micronesian islands who are working on getting a radio tower built. Please pray for their safety in the construction of this tall structure using limited equipment.

7. For our leaders: I am not a fan of our nation's leaders at the moment, but I respect that they are in those positions. Positions I could never fill myself! It can't be an easy job, and I pray that God will give them the wisdom to make the right decisions for our country.

8. For our country: As a nation we need prayer. Beyond prayer for our leaders, but prayer for the people. I pray for people to come back to God, so that as a nation we can come back to God and remember what our great country was truly founded upon. We need to constantly keep the people our our nation in prayer.

9. For the world: There is so much in the world today that brings such sadness to my heart. The world is so ignorant and blind to the perversion all around them, that nothing is shocking or surprising to anyone anymore. I pray that God will lift the ignorance from their eyes and that they may see Him and see a better way to be living. And I pray that God's people will have the courage and passion to go out into the world to share His message of hope, the only real hope.

10. For YOU: What has God placed on your heart this week? Is there something or someone you need prayer for? Feel free to share in the comment section, and I will pray for you as well.

I know I shared this verse last week, but it is so important to remember...

Pray without ceasing... ~ 1 Thessalonians 5:17

And remember, it is just as important to say thank you as it is to say please. So don't forget to praise God for the many blessings He bestows on you as well. And for that matter, praise Him for the trials that come as well- they come so that we may be broken and used by the Lord, and that should always be our heart's desire.

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A Clear and Familiar Voice

Lately I have been hearing God speak much more clearly to me. It has been so refreshing and I keep thinking, why haven't I heard Him this often before?

He is everywhere. He is in every little crevice of my life, encouraging me, guiding me, loving me.

Just the other day, I was feeling down. I felt like I would never have the opportunity to truly grow my friendships, that have lasted bordering the acquaintance/true friend line for over a year now, in fact almost 2 in some cases. I have often wondered why my children don't seem to get invited to many other kid's parties or gatherings. But I had to realize, I bring it on myself. I can get so caught up on whats easy, staying at home, adhering to nap times that could really be more flexible, or worrying about the kids behavior. These all are great reasons to stay home, but they are also poor excuses to never get out.

(Sometimes I do forget that though I enjoy hanging out around the house well enough, I have a 4 year old full of energy who just wants to be a kid and have fun, preferably with other kids just as silly as her!)

I am normally a planner, but I could not ignore a phone call from a friend one morning after a lonely evening the day before. She wanted to give me a ride to a play date. My number one excuse, I don't have a car, blown completely away. And as I considered her offer, my mind instantly came up with a list of other reasons I shouldn't go; my stomach had been hurting since I woke up; I haven't showered yet, nor had I quite gotten the kids fully dressed and ready for the day; Zachary would need a nap soon and surely without his nap, or sometimes even with it, he can get pretty cranky when we go out; and then my usual excuse since this is sometimes an outdoors adventure- it is way to hot on Guam, and I hate being sweaty! But I also heard God speaking to me about even this 'little' opportunity. How could I be upset and complain about not being as welcomed into circles of friendship if I turned down every chance I got to spend time with these ladies? How can I let inconveniences ruin my opportunity to grow friendships with good, Godly woman who I admire? So I said yes! And though it did feel inconvenient at times with a mildly cranky toddler, it was well worth the time to talk and enjoy watching the children play together. Natalie needed it too, it is good for her to get a little time to socialize since her best friend (and neighbor) has recently moved away.

(Remember kids are 100% washable! I had to keep reminding myself of that as the dirt clung to Zachary's every inch...its easier for me to keep in mind when they are a little bit older and have a better sense of it themselves. For example, not sticking your filthy hands into your mouth! Zachary had his first taste of actual dirt!)

And during the fellowship I received the answer to my first question, why haven't I heard God speak so clearly before? Because I am constantly growing closer to Him, and the more I do, the more loudly He speaks, and the more familiar I become to His voice. It is a wonderful feeling to constantly be able to listen to His direction and know I am following in His will as He shares it with me, whether it is something that may seem trivial, such as whether or not to go to a play date. Or something huge, like whether or not we should extend on our time on Guam. Life may not always be perfect, but if I am following in His will, I know my life will have that bigger purpose that I so long for, as well as peace, even in the storms.

How clearly does God speak to you? Only in nearness with God will you find true purpose and everlasting peace.

Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. ~Romans 8:8a

Now we have received, not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, so that we may know the things freely given to us by God, which things we also speak, not in words taught by human wisdom, but in those taught by the Spirit, combining spiritual thoughts with spiritual words. ~1 Corinthians 2:12-13

When Life Isn't Fair

Even when it is something I don't necessarily want to hear, I just love it when God so obviously is speaking to me through whatever means available.

Let me explain a little background info: My sister announced last June she was getting married. Of course I want to go, but along the way we have hit more then one bump in the road. In fact it has seemed more like a roller coaster ride then a bumpy road, trying to get my husband's leave approved (he is military, and nothing about being in the military is ever simple!). It isn't a matter of being told 'no' though, just 'wait' and then 'wait' again. We have jumped through many hoops trying to get it through, and there are many complicated reasons we have had problems, most of which were out of our hands, and to me, very unfair. Our biggest issue is time and money, it is expensive to leave the island, and we need to buy tickets in advance, as well as order me a bridesmaid dress if I will be able to get there. The whole thing has dragged out for over a month now for us, and I haven't felt any peace throughout the whole thing!

My husband feels defeated, and he just wants me to let it go and wait more, but I feel wronged. I want to call up his chain of command and say "That's NOT fair!" I want to find a way for 'justice' to be done, the kind of justice when I get my way, and the person unjustly standing in my path gets reprimanded.

And then today, I was looking through the new posts of the blogs I follow when I came across a post titled Why not just be wronged?. At first, I did not want to click on it. I didn't want to hear that I should just accept what has happened and let it go. After all my anger and frustration are justified, this just shouldn't be happening to us.

But I could not deny God His chance to speak to me through this blog. It was obvious, this was for me.

Why not rather be wronged? Why not rather be defrauded? ~ 1 Corinthians 6:7b

Commit your way to the Lord, Trust also in Him, and He will do it. He will bring forth your righteousness as the light and your judgement as the noonday. Rest int he Lord and wait patiently for Him; Do not fret because of him who prospers in his way... ~Psalm 37:5-7b

It isn't easy to accept, but sometimes we will be wronged, even as Christians. Even the world has their own way of saying it- Life isn't fair. Ultimately though God's justice will prevail, and that is what matters. I am not the judge, I am not the one who should seek punishment and reprimand for those who I feel are against me or have wronged me. Sometimes we need to just let it go, instead of having it fester in our hearts, creating an infection that can spread to other parts of our lives. If we want to be healthy in our walk with the Lord, it is important to let go and move on, even if we are being wronged. God is in control and He will work everything out for good, for His will.

As for the wedding, I hope I am able to go. But ultimately God knows best and He is in control. Even if I don't like the answer, just remembering He is the one in control, brings me peace. I was just struggling with keeping that in mind because in my heart I didn't want the answer to be no, or even wait. I wanted to be the one behind the wheel, but I am reminded once again, that God is the better driver when it comes to my life. For now I will just continue to pray that everything falls into place, and we are able to go, whatever the answer may be.

(And if you haven't already, I seriously encourage you to check out Mary DeMuth's post. Maybe you will also get something from it!)

Teach Me Tuesday: A Conversation with God

God was the one teaching me something in the last week, well at least something quite specific, though He is always teaching me something...if I just remember to listen.
So as I have already said, we have cancelled our cable TV. Now let me tell you why...this is the conversation I had with God about a week ago. Imagine this as a Father sitting down to talk to His daughter about a bad habit, that's exactly how it felt in my heart.

God: Crystal, I think you should cancel your cable.

Crystal: *Sigh* That would save a little money I suppose...but maybe not quite yet, after all, some of my favorite shows are in the middle of their seasons! And its so nice to sit back and watch Food Network with Jon after a long day of chasing kids around, I would miss that too much! Maybe not.

God: Crystal, you need to cancel your cable.

Crystal: *insert whiny voice* But I don't want too! I like watching my shows, they are so good.

God: How many times do those shows distract you from getting housework done? Or going to bed at the same time as your husband? And you know when you leave the TV on for 'background noise', Natalie will end up mesmerized by it.

Crystal: Well I can just turn it off more, I will turn it off more. We don't need to actually cancel cable if I just keep it off more often, and then I can still watch my favorite shows. Yes that will work out well.

God: And haven't you tried that many times before?

Crystal: Maybe...

God: And did it work for you then?

Crystal: *whispering softly* No...but I really want to watch my shows.

God: And why are those TV shows so important to you?

Crystal: I don't know, I just like them.

God: Are they more important then Me? Would you choose those shows over Me?

Crystal: Well...no, they shouldn't be...but, but...

God: Crystal, I think you need to cancel your cable.

Crystal: Yes, God. I think you are right.

When God first convicted me, I didn't want to cancel our cable because I really wanted to be able to watch my favorite shows when they came on. But I quickly realized that at that, my strong desire to NOT let go, I NEEDED too. And though I did want to procrastinate calling, I am looking forward to using the time I would've end up sitting in front of the TV, to spend more time playing with the kids and growing closer to God.

I'll Pray for You

How many times do you tell someone you will pray for them and then forget?

"I'll pray for you."

I know when I say those words, I am making a promise to that person to lift them up in their time of need, and asking God for His wisdom and blessings for them. But between saying it and sitting down for my usual quiet time, after chasing the kids around all day, feeding them breakfast, lunch and dinner, cleaning up behind them, then finally hustling the children down for bed or nap time, I have usually forgotten. Or at the very least I can't remember all the details. And though God knows all the details, sometimes I just wish I had taken the time to write it down. Even if I pray for them right away (another great habit to pray without ceasing throughout the day- 1 Thess. 5:17), its so much better to write it down so I can remember for the rest of the week!

So starting today I have new small prayer journal that fits quite nicely into my purse. My plan is to carry it with me always, so when God brings someone in my path that I need to pray for I can write it down! That way I won't forget anyone.

Added bonus, I will know all the important details when I want to go check in with someone to see if prayers have been answered or they need continued prayer for the situation. Something I need to work on: lifting others up, encouraging others and reaching out not only to the lost but to show compassion for my brothers and sisters in Christ, through prayer and encouragement.

I believe it shows someone great love and encouragement just to know they are not forgotten in their times of need, and by continually reaching out and keeping updated on situations, it portrays that love so beautifully.

Therefore, confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another so that you may be healed. The effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much. ~James 5:16

Is there some way you keep track of all the different things you plan on praying for throughout the week?

Just To Be Crystal Clear

Just a little clarification, because I wouldn't want anyone to misunderstand what I was trying to say in my previous post about the mosque.

I am not supporting the mosque. I simply have found most of the reasons I have heard opposing it to be less then sound.

I don't believe that a strip club is more morally wrong then a center built for the purpose of worshipping what I believe to be a false god. For God, all sin is black and white, and unfortunately without Christ's blood, we can never be clean from sin- we are all blackened by it until you give your life to the one true God, Almighty.

Most importantly as a Christian, I don't endorse something so completely wrong biblically. Muslims do NOT worship the same God as Christianity (and I would say further, many people who claim to be Christians are actually worshipping a different god then I do). My God, is the one and only God of the Old and New Testament. He gave His Son, Jesus, to die for my sins on a cross. He is loving and merciful. His Word, the Holy Bible is the only holy word, not to be added to or taken away from. And His Holy Spirit dwells in the hearts of those who have believed in Him and welcomed Him into their heart and life. That is my God, the one and only true God in all eternity.

As I said before, I just find most of the reasoning I have heard opposing the mosque to be ignorant or just plain wrong. And legally we have no right to keep them from building it.

I also think that ultimately we gain nothing as Christians by being prejudiced to the Islamic community. They are no different then all the other lost souls we are called to be a light to for Jesus Christ. We need to pray for them all, Muslims, Atheists, Catholics, Mormons, and many others who have been decieved by Satan.

Again this is my opinion. Please respect it and I will respect yours. I ask anyone who wishes to leave a comment to be thoughtful when doing so or I will not approve your comment. Thank you.

The Great Debate: Why Not Build a Mosque?

First of all, I really don't like to speak on politics and whatnot because my intent is not to stir up anger in issues that many get very passionate about. On this occasion though I felt convicted about it since I recently changed my opinion on the matter, and I see so many of my friends adamantly against this. So here is my opinion on the subject of a mosque at Ground Zero.

I realize I am about to join a minority here, but after a friend challenged my ignorant views about this issue, I have decided to change my opinion. There has been a very heated debate going on about the proposed mosque at Ground Zero. On Facebook I see many friends who proudly oppose this outrageous attack on 9/11 victims and their families, and I in fact at one point agreed. This was before I found out the real facts and God has been convicting me since to humbly change the side I had chosen. I was quite resistant at first, battling it out inside my own mind, coming up with excuse after excuse for how wrong it is that they would even think to put in this symbol of Islam on an American landmark that represents the terror we suffered at the hands of radical Muslims. But I began to realize the arguments against it just didn't seem to stand on as firm ground as I once thought. They were built on emotional foundations of fear and anger.
It is easy to say it would be un-Patriotic to build this mosque, and find it insulting that Muslims want to have this particular site, but despite that, even if it was some sort of Islamic symbol of their 'triumph' over the U.S. (I use the word triumph only to display how some believe the Islamic community may view it- I do not believe in any way it was a triumph over us), a symbol only has the power we may find in it. While I don't think this is the case, if the Muslims did want this mosque as a tribute to their 'triumph' on 9/11, let them have it. As Americans we need to move beyond the fear and pain we still cling to from 9/11. It will never be forgotten, but this controversial mosque is only going to serve as a symbol of defeat if we chose to let it. It doesn't change what happened that day or what will happen in the future. But by being almost afraid to let it be built simply because of what Islam could be viewing it as only gives gratification to it. If someone teases me and makes fun of how I look or act or what I believe, ultimately if I ignore them then their mocking is useless. Didn't your parents ever tell you that? Aside from that though, I think the facts of the matter speak even clearer as to why their is little reason to even debate this issue.
Did you know that the mosque is actually being built just over 2 blocks away from the actual site of Ground Zero? And the land has already been purchased and was being used as a worship place for Islam, long before this became a heated issue? In our economy today, it would be ridiculous to expect the owners behind the mosque to try to sell it and pick a new location. And it isn't the only thing in that area, there are strip clubs and other morally wrong businesses even closer to Ground Zero. And if 2 blocks still isn't far enough away, how far is acceptable? Where do we draw the line?
Did you know there is already a mosque that was established in that area before 9/11? No one has asked that this other mosque be torn down.
Did you know that a chapel was built just outside the Pentagon that holds a number of services affiliated many different religions, including Islam? No one ever opposed this, yet the Pentagon was also struck by a plane on that fateful day in history.
Do you realize we are taking out the acts of a handful of radical Muslims on the entire Islam community? As a Christian, I know I wouldn't want people to judge me on the acts of some radical groups and churches that also claim the title of Christian. I find it absolutely heartbreaking that people who claim to be followers of Christ could stand outside of funeral homes were a soldier's life is being honored and mourned with protest signs proclaiming hatred in the name of God. But the reality is that they have the right to practice whichever beliefs they chose, we all do as Americans.
Part of what has made America a nation set apart is the freedoms it offers. Freedoms that allow us to practice any religion we want- even Islam. This is what it ultimately comes down to. Freedom of religion. No matter how much I think mine is the 'right' religion, no matter how much it may seem disrespectful to some that this mosque be so close to Ground Zero, no matter what they may practice within its walls, the freedom is theirs to choose as citizens of the United States of America.
You may call me un-Patriotic as now I am among the few who do not oppose this new mosque at Ground Zero, but I am the wife of a sailor, I pray to the same God the founders of this great nation looked too when they were being persecuted for their own beliefs. And though I am not saying I am for having this mosque or religious center built, I just think if we all look closely at the issue, legally, morally, there really isn't a very strong argument against it. I respect those who oppose it though, many of my own friends do. But if you take a closer look, is there really very much to debate?

God tells us to love everyone, and that too isn't limited to the color of their skin, the religion they practice, or what country they may come from. We are called to love even those who would seem unlovable through our own sin stained glasses, even if they have hurt us in the past.

"A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another." ~Jesus, John 13:34

"But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you..." ~Jesus, Matthew 5:44

Remember this is just my opinion, which I have the freedom to express just as you do your own. Feel free to share any other arguments for either side in the comments, but as always keep it clean and respectful. Thank you.

Resources:
CBS News
Forbes
Forbes
Yahoo News
Examiner.com

Do You Eat Daily?

I don't know about everyone else, but I have grown quite accustomed to eating multiple times a day, every day. Sure occasionally, I will go without much or anything to eat for a whole day, and you how I feel by bedtime? Weak, tired, exhausted, I have a short temper and become agitated and aggravated by every little thing. It does not feel good to be that hungry.

And yet sometimes, that's exactly how I let myself get when it comes to fellowship with God.

I guess it should be of little surprise to me that Sunday is my favorite day of the week, followed by Wednesdays. Those are the days I regularly spend a great portion of my time with God, in prayer, in worship, in fellowship. I am focused on Him for the better half of Sunday, and I spend most of the day Wednesday looking forward to the chance to go to church and be with others in study of His word and in prayer to Him.

Just as I get physically weak when I go without food for an entire day, I also get spiritually weak when I try to make it through my week only sustained on fellowship with God for two of the seven days! Just as Dr. Vaughn said at church recently- you wouldn't try to eat all you can for the week in just one or two days?! So why then do we seek to get all our spiritual sustenance all at once for the week and not touch our bible as it gathers dust for the other five-six days? Why don't we seek Him and talk to Him daily just as we eat three meals a day?

We need to not only physically satisfy our hunger daily, but spiritually as well. God desires a fellowship with us every single day, and that will bring us closer to Him and further from the world.

Rejoice always; pray without ceasing; in everything give thanks; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. ~1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

Notice how Paul doesn't mention taking a break in there? Instead he says to always rejoice, not just on Sundays. Pray without ceasing, not pray only on Sundays. In everything give thanks, not be grateful at least on Sundays.

And just as food gives us strength to carry out our daily tasks and work, so the time we spend with God, in the word and in prayer, strengthens us for the daily spiritual battle that is constantly raging even within our own homes.

Therefore, take up the full armor of God. so that you will be able to resist in the evil day, and having done everything, to stand firm. Stand firm therefore, having girded your loins with truth and having put on the breastplate of righteousness, and having shod your feet with the preparation of the Gospel of Peace; in addition to all, taking up the shield of faith with which you will be able to extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. With all prayer and petition pray at all times in the Spirit, and with this in view, be on alert with all perseverance and petition for all the saints... ~ Ephesians 6:13-18

WOW! What imagery this creates!! We need to be constantly alert because we are in a spiritual battle, and I am sure you can ask many of the men and women over in Iraq- in a battle, you don't get to just take a few days off!! You need to keep yourself strong and prepared always because you never know what is going to come your way next. It is the same in this spiritual battle, we need to be walking with God always, so that He may give us the wisdom and strength to make it through!

Would you go into a battle hungry?

Two Junior High Treasures: Mrs. G and Lindsey

Eighth grade is for me just a cluster of little but sometimes big memories, though I didn't always know they were big at that time. In a lot of ways, good and bad, it was a beginning.
One of my favorite classes in junior high, was creative writing. I was very self conscious in everything because I had low self esteem and self image. But in creative writing I blossomed! I felt right at home and it was really one of the first classes I felt I excelled in and also enjoyed. In fact, when we were in a group once, sharing and revising our freshest short stories, no one could come up with anything wrong with my story, not even a spelling error. My teacher, Mrs. G, came over, she would always say there was room for improvement and she would help them find something on mine, because really no one wanted to give anyone any criticisms. Mrs. G read my paper, and when she looked up she had a huge smile across her face. She said they couldn't find anything to fix, because there wasn't anything wrong! I was so excited! I felt proud to find my niche. I could write.
In another class, later that year, Mrs. G was my teacher yet again, this time for life management class- basically similar to home ec. We learned recipes and cooking skills (which I quickly forgot) and also we did simulated games when we would have 'money' and draw different jobs and circumstances. No egg babies or getting 'married' luckily, though I did have an egg baby for a babysitting course I took in 5th grade. During one of our simulated games, Mrs. G pointed me out to the whole class as being the smartest with my money, because I was the only one saving any (of course saving it is a lot easier when it's pretend money!!). I felt so proud of myself, and believed that would mean I was ready for the real world. Little did I know how much that class didn't really cover!! Mrs G, though hated by most students, became one of my favorites as she encouraged me and boosted my confidence throughout my junior high years. I even would see her come into the thrift store I worked at during high school. She always came in once a year, maybe twice, right before school would start and buy mounds of clothes (I worked there 4 years, and I was working each year when she came in)! I learned a lot from her, not only about writing, but also many skills that did stick with me from that life management class (apart from the cooking).

Something else that happened during my years at junior high (7th-9th grades in my school district), was learning that a good friend of mine had melanoma. Her name was Lindsey. She was actually in my creative writing class, and she was very talented. Not only could she write, she could draw as well. She ended up designing the cover for our class 'book' that we made as a collection of our favorite poems and short stories we wrote during creative writing class. It had lots of palm trees and water falls on the cover. Lindsey loved to draw palm trees and waterfalls, she would've loved Guam.
I remember Lindsey sitting at the lunch table showing me the small crater in her forehead where they had removed the cancerous mole. She tried not to make a big deal out of it, and since I knew little of cancer or what to say to her, I let it go. Life went on that year and it didn't really come up much. What I didn't know is that melanoma can be deadly. We didn't see each other much in high school. It was gradual, and I don't remember exactly when, but by senior year she wasn't attending anymore and I saw her once at the store without her hair. I still didn't know what to say, though it broke my heart inside. I remember around graduation encouraging my friend Victoria to go visit with Lindsey (who she was a lot closer with then I was). Victoria was scared, maybe of saying goodbye, or seeing her as she was now, sickly. She asked me to come along, but I came up with an excuse not too. I was scared as well. Victoria went to see her, I didn't. A few weeks later after coming home from work, my mom, with tears glistening in her eyes asked me to sit down. I knew something was wrong but I had no idea what it could be. I refused to sit down and insisted she just tell me, but all she could do was hand me the piece of newspaper with Lindsey's picture on it. As soon as I recognized it as an obituary I broke down and cried. Once I was composed, I immediately tried to reach Victoria, to see how she was. I don't remember if she had known or not yet, I think I may have been the one to reach her mom and tell her, and then I went over to their house to be with her. Later we went to the funeral together.
I still cry at the thought that I never said goodbye to Lindsey. I never talked to her about Jesus, and I don't know if she knew Him or not, so I may never get to see her ever again. How could I let the chance to share with her and say goodbye slip through my fingers? How could I say no, when God tugged at my heart to talk to her in her last weeks? It is still something that sometimes haunts me now, and sometimes it all feels like a dream. How could any of it be real? Graduating high school should be a time of celebration, how could a girl who should be excited as her life is just beginning be gone in just an instant?

This is my 10th post in a series of 15 that I am doing to record my youth with other woman at
.

It's Not Enough

It's not enough.

Going to church every Sunday & Wednesday is not enough. Surrounding yourself with good Christian friends is not enough. Tithing regularly is not enough. Blessing your food before you eat is not enough. Doing daily devotionals is not enough.

God is not just a routine. Jesus is not just someone we sing pretty songs about. The Holy Spirit is not just a feeling. Being a Christian is not just being a part of a church.

If anyone thinks himself to be religious, and yet does not bridle his tongue but deceives his own heart, this man's religion is worthless. Pure and undefiled religion in the sight of our God and Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their distress, and to keep oneself unstained by the world. ~James 1:26-27

There is so much more that we often miss. God wants to be so much more in our lives. Jesus wants to do so much more through our lives. The Holy Spirit wants to dwell within our lives.

Submit therefore to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. ~James 4:7-8a

Nothing should come before Him. Nothing should distract us from Him. Nothing should hold our hearts above Him. Or something is wrong.

If we are redeemed we are called to be apart from this world. Our life is no longer our own, it is His. And we need to remember that.

Do not love the world nor the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh and the lust of the eyes and the boastful pride of life, is not from the Father, but is from the world. The world is passing away, and also its lusts; but the one who does the will of God lives forever. ~1 John 2:15-17

You don't just represent yourself, or even your biological family anymore. You represent the church family. You represent Him.

For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them. ~Ephesians 2:10

This is something we all struggle with at times. We are selfish, sinful people by nature, but we need to overcome our sin. Just as Jesus overcame death.

"O Death, Where is your victory? O Death, where is your sting?" The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law; but thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. Therefore, my beloved brethren, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing your toil is not in vain in the Lord. ~1 Corinthians 15:55-58

It isn't easy. But anything less is just not enough.

You Can't Work Towards Grace

One of the common answers to the question "Are you going to Heaven?" would be something along the lines of "Yes, because I am a good person." So often people think by being good, doing good things that they will make it to heaven. Sadly though they are wrong.
Grace is the only way to get through those pearly gates. By the grace of God, which He offers freely, your name can be written in the book of life. You can live eternally in heaven one day!

For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God; not as a result of works, so that no one may boast. ~Ephesians 2:8-9

How awesome is that?! Truly there is no way we could ever work our way to righteousness because no matter how hard we try, even the best of us sin. It may be in your heart, something only between you and God, or it may be something huge, that our earthly law penalizes with prison. But God offers grace to everyone. To Him all sin, big or small, it is black and white, there is no gray area.

As it is written, "There is none righteous, not even one; There is none who understands, there is none who seeks for God; All have turned aside, together they have become useless; There is none who does good, there is not even one." ~Romans 3:10-12

Though while works do not get anyone admittance into heaven, not even Christians, as believers under grace we should endeavor to do works for the Lord.

But are you willing to recognize, you foolish fellow, that faith without works is useless?...For just as the body without the spirit is dead, so also faith without works is dead. James 2:20,26

Because just as you would thank someone who gives you any kind of gift, we should show our gratitude for His awesome gift of salvation, which was purchased for us at the ultimate price, through the death of His Son.

But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. Much more then, having now been justified by His blood, we shall be saved from the wrath of God through Him. Romans 5:8-9

The precious blood of Jesus Christ that saved us from our sin should also be what motivates us to do works for Him. Not because we need to for us to enter heaven, but because we want to in our love for Him and His sacrifice.

So You Think You're Starving?

Any given day, I may be sitting on the couch reading a good book, or preparing dinner in the kitchen, when Natalie will walk over to me and announce, "I'm starving!" This is a phrase my husband has gotten into the habit of using, and since passed it on to our daughter. I don't ever remember feeling the irritation towards him for the use of that word, but now as my daughter uses it unsparingly, I find it to be quite disturbing.
It is not an uncommon part of our day to day lives to hear someone, or find ourselves, saying "I'm starving," to indicate our 'level' of hunger. We aren't simply craving a snack, we want something truly filling and hardy because we feel empty. Even in the dictionary the term 'starve' has been defined as 'to be extremely hungry' as its secondary meaning. But lets not neglect the primary meaning of the word. Starve: to weaken, waste, or die from lack of food.
In our country there are few who truly fall into that category. Most of us, certainly those with access to a computer and the internet who are able to read this, do not suffer from starvation in its truest meaning. We are not likely to die from lack of food, and in fact we probably have very little idea of how weakened we can become from no food for more then a day. I have gone a full day without one meal or even a snack. It wasn't on purpose, it was simply because other things happening that day kept me from getting to eating. Even then I was not starving. I had no lack of food, in fact it was abundantly available to me when I was ready for it. And even if my own kitchen were not conveinent, I had a number of fast food establishments and grocery stores accessible to me. So even then when I may have been slightly weakened from not eating, I could still not claim an actual lack of food.
In our own household we have made the word 'starving' a bad word. Occasionally my husband will slip up from habit, but we are making it a point to remind ourselves and our children what true starvation is. There really are many people, children and babies, who are literally starving in other countries. Starvation is a real and tragic sadness in our world today, so lets not become numb to the true meaning of starvation. Remember you are blessed to live in a country where it would indeed be difficult to find nothing to eat. As you sit down to your overly large second helping of dinner tonight, say a prayer for those who are dying somewhere in the world right now, from a lack of any food at all. And the next time you feel the pains of hunger, think twice before uttering the phrase "I'm starving!", and realize you have no idea how starvation actually feels.

Blog Bash Challenge: 'Life Song'

So the next challenge for Blog Bash, hosted by Not Your Average Teen, is to pick a song that is your 'life song'. Its hard to find one song that I would say is my 'life song'. I mean there are so many wonderful songs that speak to me in so many different ways and I connect with each one on many different and intersecting ways. I originally wasn't going to bother with this challenge, but then I was listening to some music today and one song in particular struck a cord: "Legacy" by Nichole Nordeman. It also fits in with our church's theme this year, which is making a difference. I have always grown up wishing I could make a difference.

I want to leave a legacy, how will they remember me? Did I choose to love? Did I point to You enough to make a mark on things? I want to leave an offering. Child of mercy and grace who blessed Your Name unapologetically. I want to leave a legacy. ~Nichole Nordeman, Legacy

I want to get to heaven someday and have God say to me "Well done my good and faithful servant." I want to stand out for Him, and have an impact, it is the deepest desire of my heart to proclaim Him. And I believe blogging is an outreach that gives me that opportunity.

How I Found True Love

I grew up searching for love. I wanted to find the perfect man to share my life with and church seemed a good place to start. As a child I would go to church as often as I could. I went to Catholic church with my 'step' grandfather occasionally when I was really young and then as a preteen I began going to a baptist church with my sister's friend for AWANA. At first just my little sister had been invited to go along with her new best friend, and same name pal, Nicole, but after a week or 2, the rest of us were allowed to tag along also. That eventually evolved into not only Wednesday nights, but Sunday morning services as well. My first experience in Sunday school was not a super positive one, but I was just a very sensitive soul, and the teacher had unintentionally hurt my feelings. Still I felt drawn to church and I loved being surrounded by a group of people who just seemed to care.

Love was in the air at church and somewhere along the line that's where I met 'Him'. The man I had been longing for. He was kind and caring. I knew He would always take care of me. I loved Him.

Over the next few months, I jumped at any opportunity possible to go to church, where I could be closest to Him. The atmosphere there was like none I had ever experienced before, I was accepted in this world. When at my very public school, I was often the outcast and never quite popular enough to feel comfortable. But when we began going to church I never looked back. I didn't want that part anymore, I was content to who I had become at school, because I knew I would always have Him and I would always have church. Though I had never said a specific prayer, I knew Him in my heart. I was baptized along with my mom, at the age of 12. I knew Jesus' love, and I knew He had died for me, and I wanted nothing more than to give Him my life.

In my teen years, the monumental moment when I got my license came and I could not have been more thrilled to have a car. I actually had a job a couple of months prior, so I needed that car to drive to work, and more importantly to drive myself to church. My mom, being a manager in the retail business, was not able to have as many weekends off anymore as she had when my sisters and I were younger. I on the other hand, refused to work Sundays, at least any hours that conflicted with church. Occasionally I would do a short shift, I would rush off after the morning service and then rush back just a few minutes late for youth group. I was used to the rushing anyway, most of my shifts were immediately after school, a 20-30 minute drive away! I rushed EVERYWHERE those 3 years in high school!

Nothing could keep me from my church and from my Jesus. My heart ached, and still does today, seeing those around me, stumbling awkwardly in the dark. I even wrote a poem about it in high school. I would spend nights crying myself to sleep because I loved my friends, but some just would not hear the truth. Their ears and their hearts were closed to my words, to His words. I remember one girl though. She was new to our church, and a year older then I was. I had never had someone ask me so many questions about salvation! I said the prayer with her that I had heard recited so often in church, and since I didn't have all the answers for her questions myself, I was able to direct her to someone who would. I just remember feeling such excitement at her curiosity and then overwhelming joy when she did accept Jesus. She had met the perfect man that would love her unconditionally, just as I had years before. It was an indescribable feeling to be able to be a part of introducing her to Jesus.

But my heart still aches, because even within my own family, I know there are some still searching for perfect love now. Some think they find it in another person, others maybe in a bottle, or in sports or maybe work. Truly though the only place you can find such perfect love is in the Bible and in the hearts of His believers today. And the best part is, it is a completely free and wonderful gift. It can heal all the hurts in your past and bring new, true joy for the future. And it is unconditional, no matter what deep dark secrets you may cling onto, He knows them, and He wants you to let them go and be washed by His grace. And when you do, you have the assurance of an everlasting life with Him in heaven.

Do you know this perfect love yet? Will you go to heaven when you die? It's not about doing or being what the world calls 'good', its about knowing and accepting Christ's free gift of salvation. And if you want to know Him all you have to do is pray for Him to come into your heart and be a part of your life. There are no special secret words, because this must be a sincere prayer from your heart. Just close your eyes, bow you head and call out to Jesus, ask for forgiveness from your sinners and welcome Him into your heart and life to be Lord. You must turn away from things of the world, and rest on Him alone.

"For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life." ~John 3:16

"And there is salvation in no one else; for there is no other name under heaven that has been given among men by which we must be saved." ~ Acts 4:12

Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come. ~2 Corinthians 5:17

In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of His grace... ~Ephesians 1:7

If you said that prayer please feel free to contact me! I would love to rejoice with you in your new life and new hope in Jesus!! The next step would be to get a bible, so you can learn God's word and grow closer to Him, as well as to find a church with other believers so that they may encourage you and pray for you!

How Is YOUR Posture?

I have always had a problem with my posture. I much prefer to slouch then put the effort in to stand up straight and tall. Even my husband now, concerned about the future back problems I have yet to develop from this bad habit, gets on my case about it. I know to the world good posture can make you more attractive sometimes, shows confidence, and maybe even in some a little cockiness as well.
How would you describe your posture? Are you proud to say you have good posture; Tall and straight, head up, just as your parents always hassled you about at the dinner table?
What about your spiritual posture? Do you think God wants you to be standing up nice and tall, proud even, or maybe He is asking that instead you bow your heart and bend your knees.

Come let us worship and bow down, Let us kneel before the Lord our God our Maker. Psalm 95:6

Bowing down and kneeling before God is an act of great humility. And that is exactly what God wants from us. A humble and open heart. Being humble is putting God before your own needs, obeying Him and doing His will above anything else. And the best part is, when we are humble enough to put God first, He will provide our every need. He will exalt us.

Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time. 1 Peter 5:6

But God doesn't just want us to humble ourselves to Him.
As a teenager, I used to love all the different acronyms people would come up with- PUSH- Pray Until Something Happens, WWJD- What Would Jesus Do, FROG- Fully Rely On God, BIBLE- Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth, and one I recently heard, GRACE-God's Riches At Christ's Expense. But I think the one that has stuck with me most, that I can remember from when I first started regularly attending church at age 12, is JOY- Jesus, Others, Yourself. God not only wants us to humble ourselves before Him, but also before others. We need to be willing to serve others, just as Christ came to serve us the greatest love the world has ever know. He is our example of service to others and putting others before ourselves. Jesus had the ultimate humility when He died for us on the cross. And even in His earthly life, He left us with examples of His humility, so that we may follow Him.

...and all of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another for God is opposed to the proud, but give grace to the humble. 1 Peter 5:5b

"If I then, the Lord and the Teacher, washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another's feet. For I gave you an example that you also should do as I did to you." John 13:14-15

How is your posture? Is God poking you, as your parents once did, but instead, He is asking why you do not humble yourself and bow before Him? Or maybe you need to kneel to wash the feet of another?
Remember to have true JOY, you must put Jesus first, others second and yourself last.

All in His Time

I am pretty sure I am not alone when I ponder this: why is it that inspiration seems to always strike when my head has found that comfortable spot on my pillow as my day comes to a close! I truly believe my 'creative juices' are like those babies who seem to have their days and nights all mixed up. Sometimes I get that itch to write about something during the day, but more often then not, whether its writing a blog, or brainstorming for more birthday party ideas for the kids next bash, it always hits me as I crawl into my nice cozy bed, beside my sweet husband who hates going to sleep without me there, which lately seems to be quite often!
I wish, oh how I wish, my mind had an off switch! I would definitely be a more rested mommy if that were the case. But alas, that is one thing God did not install when He created me, just as He intended.
I think we often don't like God's timing, we say no, not now, wait until next week, my calendar is completely clear...next week. Then of course something comes up and soon it becomes next month, next year, after the kids graduate and leave the nest, then I will be totally free and clear! Of course who knows if you will be around then? By then God will have found someone else who is eager to serve Him immediately!
Even now, I think, "Oh Lord, I have so much going on right now, Jon has duty the next 2 weekends, I have to reschedule Zachary's party- remember that Lord, because he got sick on his birthday of all days- yeah, and then, then I still need to get ready for my mom's big visit next month, I need to clean and prepare everything, yep LOTS to do Lord, so right after my mom leaves I will start that new ministry idea you whispered in my ear, as soon as she leaves, well at least by the end of that month because then I have a party thing to host the weekend after she goes..." and the list goes on. Don't get me wrong, all those things are important to me, but NOTHING should come before the Lord, and what He has for me to do! Whether it is to get back up out of bed and post a blog about something He has burdened my heart with or a new ministry He has given me to use for Him, I need to do it in His timing not my own. And as Pastor Schettler shared about Thursday night in his message, this includes prayer. If God lays something on your heart to pray about, you need to stop what you are doing and pray! If we don't, then we forget, or get caught up in something else, we procrastinate- one of my biggest weaknesses, and Satan definitely knows it, and will use it if I let him!
We don't know when we will die. We don't know when anyone will die, even the unsaved neighbor we keep meaning to try and witness too. We don't know what seeds a blog we post might plant, or why God wants us to pray for someone out of the blue, but we know if we don't listen to the Holy Spirit's guidance we might not have the chance to play the role God wants us too in someone coming to Christ. He wants to use us, and instead of fiting it into our schedule, we need to fit our lives into His, because His schedule has no flaws, no missed appointments, no cancellations. His schedule, His timing is perfect. Everything happens all in His time.

"Seek the Lord while He may be found; Call upon Him while He is near." Isaiah 55:6

"I hastened and did not delay to keep Your commandments." Psalm 119:60

"Do not boast about tomorrow, for you do not know what a day may bring forth." Proverbs 27:1

"And He [Jesus] said to another, 'Follow Me.' But he said, 'Lord, permit me first to go and bury my father.' But He said to him, 'Allow the dead to bury their own dead; but as for you, go and proclaim everywhere the kingdom of God.' Another also said, 'I will follow You, Lord; but first permit me to say goodbye to those at home.' But Jesus said to him, 'No one, after putting his hand to the plow and looking back, is fit for the kingdom of God." Luke 9:59-62

"Therefore be on the alert, for you do not know which day your Lord is coming." Matthew 24:42

Overflowing with Joy to Share

I don't know about most of you, but after only attending 2 of the 5 evening services during the Missions Conference at Harvest Baptist Church (and also the Sunday morning service of course!), I feel very convicted about certain areas.
For those who aren't sharing this little island with me, our church does a Missions Conference around this time every year. This year a Pastor from Santa Maria, CA came with a group of seniors from their church. While the seniors worked with the children, Pastor Schettler gave some amazing messages! Now, I will be honest, it took me a while to come around to the messages, because while I recognized instantly the truth in them, I was just so overwhelmed, and at first, thrown off on the presentation. I have never had a Pastor, or heard a Pastor, with so much enthusiasm! I mean he was all over the stage, and at points was yelling at us because his excitement for his messages seemed to just boil over inside of him. He had no choice but to let it flow out! Not being used to that, I didn't appreciate it at first, I tend to like what I am used to and not care for change or being out of the ordinary patterns, but I now wish I could have gone to all the services (which wasn't for lack of trying, sickness & Jon coming home late from work is what kept us away).
After a week of stewing over somethings, particularly from Sunday morning's service, I admire his confidence and excitement for the messages he shared with us. And I hope people can look at me, and see the same joy overflowing in my life, because we are not meant to keep it all inside. We need to let Jesus' love and light shine through us! And we need to be excited about it!!
On Sunday morning, he shared with our congregation 3 keys to moving stones out of the way so that we are able to minister to the lost world we live in. The first was that we need to get creative! This reminded me of something else I recently learned. During our ladies night for missions last week, we broke into prayer groups who each had a particular missionary that our church supports to pray for. My group prayed for the Childs family in Australia. Apparently in Australia, at least the part they are ministering in, there is a high concentration of cults, specifically Mormons and Jehovah's Witnesses. And part of our prayer for them was that they may be creative in how they reach the people there, because the traditional methods of going door to door wouldn't be an option because they would want to stand apart from the cults, those 2 in particular, which do tend to do a lot of knocking on doors. And my thought was, boy am I glad I am not them and thats not my job! Because I could never come up with a very creative way to minister to anyone. But after Sunday morning, I realized, though I am not in Australia, nor do I feel called to be a missionary abroad, but I still need to be reaching out, and I still need to be creative about how I approach it. And that is what has gotten me on the path for a new ministry opportunity that with the Lord's guidance I am developing through my love of baking, and sharing those treats with others!
The next key part of moving stones away is confidence. Confidence that when we pray, God will act. Not praying out of obligation, half-heartedly hoping, just maybe God will answer this prayer request if He really wants too. NO!! Pray expecting, knowing, and believing God CAN and God WILL act on our prayers. We may not always get the answer we want, but if we actually have confidence that our prayers will be answered, we could see our friends and family come to know the Lord!! Instead of thinking maybe God will hear, KNOW God will hear your prayers because He ALWAYS does. I know this is definitely an area I need to really concentrate on improving. I need to have faith and confidence that God will answer my prayers; instead of 'just hoping' and praying with a question mark at the end of my prayer when it should be an exclamation point!
And the last part of moving stones and other obstacles out of the way to reach lost souls is to have compassion. As for me, I think my compassion is there...sometimes, when its convenient for me. I can really struggle sometimes with finding little things to irritate me, and then later learning I misjudged. Instead I should always seek to be compassionate and caring to everyone, instead of finding a negative in any given situation. For example, standing in line at the post office to get a package the other day, a woman with a small girl came over and got into this gap in the line. Instantly I was irritated and upset, it was a long line, I had been standing in it for a few minutes but was already getting bored and tired. I thought how dare she just cut her way in, but then I heard her thank the man behind her, and as I observed further I realized she had already been in that spot in the line but had been letting her little girl wander a little, and in her wandering she had gone out of sight. So the woman had been only coming back to her original spot in line, that the man behind her was kind enough to hold, while she retrieved her child. I felt awful! Though this all only happened in my own mind and was not shared with the rest of the crowd, I know God saw how ugly my heart had been, instead of showing compassion to everyone no matter what circumstances were going on. And I realize, even if she had been 'cutting' in line, I was still wrong for not having a loving heart, a compassionate heart toward her. If I want Jesus to use me, then I need to remember to always, regardless of circumstance, be kind, caring, loving and compassionate, in my heart, mind and actions.
All that said, I have a LOT to work on and pray about!! And that was all in ONE message!! But all of us can always improve, no matter where we are in our lives and our walk with the Lord. He never wants us to stand still and just be content to go no further, He wants us bubbling over with joy for Him like Pastor Schettler is! He wants it to pour out of us everywhere we go and in everything we do. And I hope I have done Pastor Schettler some justice in passing on his message. I did the best I could from memory because I did not take notes that day (shame on me!).

"Being unable to get to Him [Jesus] because of the crowd, they removed the roof above Him; and when they had dug an opening, they let down the pallet on which the paralytic was lying." Mark 2:4 (Creativity)

"Therefore I say to you, all things for which you pray and ask, believe that you have recieved them, and they will be granted you." Mark 11:24 (Confidence)

"So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience." Colossians 3:12 (Compassion)